Seven things

Ah, yeah, the Series of Tubes strikes again. A good friend of mine, Michael, from a previous life in Austin, chimed in and pinged me for a task only the Internets could offer. And whatever the Internet wants, the Internet gets. And besides, it's good self-inventory for my old bones to refer to the rarely-known bits about me. I'm older, but I'm never too old to reflect on my own odd trivia.

So, here it is. It's called Seven Things (as opposed to my three things at the end of each post). The rules are easy to break:

• Write seven things people may or may not know about you (that is interesting enough to float on a blog).
• Link the individual whom pinged to what you have created (look Michael, I made a post! Yes, I will clean it up).
• Share it with seven new people (the pinged becomes the ping-er).
• As a courtesy, let them know that you have homework.
  

So, it's post time. Seven things...

ONE: Growing up in San Antonio, my only major injury I ever suffered as a kid was four stitches to the top of my head. That's it. Four measly stitches. It's wasn't because I didn't try to hurt myself ever time I exited the house, it just never happened. With two brothers, you would think there would be more bang-ups.

TWO: For twenty-five weeks, I was the co-host and co-producer of an Alternative radio show called The ALT (pronounced A-L-T). We pulled of "The Next Big Thing" but only in the 131st media market in the nation. It was so cutting edge, we were on AM. It was sweet, until they pulled the plug.

THREE: Most everyone knows this one, but I used to fence for UT. I represented the Longhorns roaming the state and country picking a fight with my foils for four years. The one drawback was that it was a club team - no NCAA backing for this sport at Austin. At least there is one sport Ohio State can't lose to us. Burn!

How did "working for Kinky Friedman" not make the cut?

FOUR: Garner doesn't sound Latino. But I am. Well, half Latino. It confuses the hell out of the bigots, but my mom is a Ramirez, regardless of her fair skin. My grandmother speaks solomente espanol. She gets a kick out of me struggling with my Spanish. I have to say, it kinda helps me with my exotic look.

FIVE: And to boot, my dad is adopted. So, I am a Garner by name and spirit. But by genetics...fuck that, I'm a Garner, too. However, the one scary part about having an adopted parent is the medical wild card it presents later in life. I have no idea what the genetic history of my father is. So, when at the doctor's checkup, the family history is hazy on one side while somewhat certain on the other. And I have to say, it help with my exotic look.

SIX: It took me seven years to finish college. No, I don't have my masters. No, I don't have a rough draft of my dissertation. And no, I'm not going back. I have my BA and I am okay with that. And I have made peace with the "what the hell took you so long" statement. Hey, I got it done. I am "bona fide". They can't revoke a degree, can they?

SEVEN: I have a working draft of a film script. It's pretty good. Kind of a "coming of life" micro-epic. Any takers? Anyone?

Okay, that's my seven. Hopefully Michael is not disappointed in my "quality". If I was a bit more interesting, I might have had some real eyebrown-raisers. No rodeo cowboy vignettes (Dad), no migrant worker stories (Mom), no tales of college football (both Jeff and Andrew) and no Vegas intrigue (Sabrina). But, it hasn't been bad.

So, let's throw some people under the bus, shall we? Per Michael's instigation, I need seven people to keep this broadcasting rolling. So, why not throw down the contributors roll call? NEW RULE! We don't need to stalk bloggers, if we go wide open with this, then I just gain more contributors. Win-win, baby.

Courtney: The gauntlet has been thrown. There was a reason I called you out. You have a precise wit and a vocabulary to express it. The Seven is merely a start to your blogging greatness. Besides, I have to get your Northern Florida perspective.

Mason: I know you bring the noise (with a side of low-carb funk) to your other multimedia contributions. So, I would like for you to bring the pain as I know you can do it. Not that I'm calling you out or anything. Plus, you have about ten other things you juggle on a daily basis...but is that really an excuse?

Meli: Very compelling stuff you already have generated, both in this blog and personally to me. It would be fun though to see if you can make my jaw drop. Not that you dropping my jaw is difficult for you, my dear.

ML: The homegrown product has to have some interesting stuff that I had no idea about. You can start by talking about how difficult it was to get your MBA. Because law school was boring, I guess. Oops, I hope I did not spoil a future post.

Haas: First, you need to answer my damn emails. Second, get on the big board with the rest of us. Third, quit being the best dad ever and take a moment to write down some thoughts. If you are going to scare the hell out of me being a potential father, it might as well be in blog format.

Freaking Pena: Oh, I see how it is. You can fill out a questionnaire from the Caller-Times but you don't have time to make Mickey Mouse Club rollcall? If positive reinforcement is what you are looking for, I have a bottle of wine and a PS3 at the house. Now, get motivated.

Okay, that's six...I will have to recruit a seventh. To be completed...

MY Three Things for this week:
1) Okay, if it is a VIP room, you don't have to allow every Tom, Dick and Sherri in the VIP room. Last time I checked, that was for exclusivity. Not really exclusive if you have to wait ten minutes for a Jameson on the rocks.
2) I live in a city that is breaking the law. Awesome. Add another screw up to the list.
3) Thank you, Greg, for a great time this weekend. You can't go home again, but you can find a classy joint to have a drink at while you are home...again.

Talk later.